About Me

Hello,

My name is Marshall.  I was born and raised in America, in the great state of TEXAS.  After 20 years doing a variety of different jobs in the U.S. Air force I decided to retire.  I maintained the avionic systems on F-15 aircraft, was an Air Force master instructor, and got to create computer based learning. 

I was married for 23 years. (Divorced now 6 years.) Over 23 years of marriage I helped raise 5 children. I decided to raise them differently than I was. I had a completely different experience growing up–my mom was 17 and my dad 18 when I was born. They were still kids finding their way in life. I had to learn life by myself in the 70’s, alone. I’m not complaining. I’m grateful because this helped me cope with life’s many unknowns. I honestly didn’t know what I was going to eat from day to day, or where I was going to sleep (or even if I was going to be able to sleep.) My parents were young, wild, and free spirits. They liked to “party” a lot (loud music, tons of people, beer, smoking, some had clothes on, etc.)

My children, in contrast, had a parent with them 24/7, caring for them all day, every day. They had no question whether they were going eat. They went to bed every night at the same time, tucked into bed, just after we read together. (gathering for family reading was a nightly thing.) Also, from day one of their lives they were raised in a church environment. Religion was their life. They studied and learned from several great pastors like: Chuck Smith, Alistair Begg, John MacArthur, Chuck Swindoll, and Voddie Baucham Jr. They studied the original Greek and Hebrew language on which the Bible was based (More than most pastors.) I had software that could search any biblical text within seconds, including the original Greek/Hebrew writings. Our children studied Christian history very thoroughly, including a complete history of the Hebrews and their culture. They all picked up music really quickly (guitar, violin, drums, piano, and singing.) Closer to the end of our marriage my ex-wife expressed a strong desire to be Jewish. She felt it was the place she really wanted to be. She was even willing to forego her own Hispanic heritage. Our children naturally gravitated wherever she wanted and also preferred Messianic Judaism to mainline Christianity.

My typical day (24/7…365 days a year) was filled with military work, family, home schooling, and Church. My children were the center of our family universe every day. I tried to be a 110% military working father balancing what time I had between family, work, and church. I never went out. Everything was for them. Guns were not welcome in our home. This includes any movies with guns. My children were rapidly escorted out of the house if I would begin any movies containing guns. Prayer was done a certain way, otherwise it wasn’t acceptable. (any prayer was fine by me.)

I spent everything I made on family, church, and donated to every cause, without a penny left to spare. My children were given allowances and encouraged to set aside a portion for giving to their favorite charities. They participated in social events, helping the homeless by passing out food. I didn’t know what “time off” meant. There’s no such thing as “time off” when you’re homeschooling 5 children.

My wife was a full-time stay-at-home mom (for 23 years) who worked home schooling our children and was 100% her own boss. Having children and raising them was her one and only passion, next to religion. As time went on we couldn’t relate like we used to. I reached out to a local pastor for marriage counseling. She wanted religion to tell her how to live her life 110%–how to dress, what to eat, what music to listen to, what movies to watch, how to think, who our children should marry. The pastor slipped my family out the back door and divorce papers soon followed. That New Mexico pastor is now the proud owner of 5 children raised and nurtured by me for 23 years. I’ve been cutoff from my entire family. Parental Alienation to the extreme. I must admit. I didn’t see that coming. Would you trust a church after that?

After she left, I shut down my life. It was like a death in the family…my whole family. I took the necessary time to seriously reflect on my life and all of the events. It wasn’t easy. I was totally abandoned without any contact. No phone calls, emails, letters, nothing for 6 years now. This goes against the Judges order, however she’s hiding them and parental alienation has already taken over their lives.

I learned a lot about myself in this time.

• I’ve always been a ‘spiritual’ person–not a ‘religious’ person. Religion is based on someone else’s views/beliefs, while spirituality is my own experience.

• I was embracing and living someone else’s views (giving up my own core identity.) Both Military and Church encourage members to lose their personal identity. (I was in both for 20 years. Losing your identity is considered the highest achievement.) There’s a very serious problem with suicide in the American military. Suicide is at a record all-time high and the Air Force’s highest ranking General doesn’t know what’s going on. Maybe there’s a connection?

• My values are my life and I am spiritually ‘response-able’ to live my life how I see fit. (It’s not a pastors or anyone else’s responsibility.)

• I’m sick of people telling me to be someone else without even getting to know me….I’m happy with just being me.

• I grew up in an ‘unconditional’ loving home, where who you are is ‘good enough‘ and appreciated.

• There’s absolutely no reason to be anyone else. Have a nice day.

One of the things that helps clear my mind is jogging. I jog around 500ish miles a year.

Best,

Marshall